Checking in

I have not been a very good blogger lately. I know this. I try and find ways to fit everything that I want to do into my life, and it just doesn’t work. Things always come up, and pull me in other directions. I’m telling you, if there was a way that I could, all I would do would be travel around, right about my adventures, and take pictures.  That’s it! But, unfortunately I have to do that work thing. And I also have to take care of my family, and my house, and the things that arise with all of that.

Last Sunday instead of adventuring, I had to paint my exterior doors, go to Walmart, and do something else around the house. All of this is stuff that has to be done if you own home, it’s just stuff that gets in the way.  Last week was actually really messed up anyway. Sterling and I went to the gym one day, because the week was terrible. My youngest son lost a very good friend of his to a car accident. This girl was in the prime of her life, and her candle was snuffed out. By a stupid accident, one that wasn’t even her fault. My youngest son had to learn the lesson that sometimes for no apparent reason people are taken from us. That’s a lesson that’s always hard, no matter what age you are. He and this girl we’re very good friends, and she’d been to our house. So, last week was messed up. How do you let your child know that there must be a reason why she’s gone? How do you explain to your child that someone just out of carelessness cause the death of his friend? It’s always hard, for a mom or a dad, when the child is hurting. It’s our very nature to want to hold them and cuddle them and protect them until the herd is gone. There is some hurts that you can’t do that with. And as I watched my son cry one night, I knew that at his age I couldn’t just have him climb onto my lap and snuggle him. One thing my son hates more than anything else is showing weakness, he gets that from his mother, and for him that his weakness. How do I let him know, that sometimes it’s OK to show weakness. Showing emotion is not weakness but actually strength. Anyway, the whole week was messed up. So it threw us out of our routine. And on Sunday, I had things that had to be done.

So far, this week has been a little better. We’re back on the routine, but now Sterling is working in Baton Rouge. It’s Easter break at school, and so my 16-year-old son and his friend took off last night, in my truck, and drove three hours to Baton Rouge to work with his dad. Let me tell you, that was another hard thing. I had to watch my son drive away from me, knowing that he was heading into Baton Rouge traffic, and even though his dad was on the other end of the death of the journey, it’s still hard knowing that he is going to be driving that distance by himself. He did it, as I knew we would, but it doesn’t make it any easier for parents. I’m reminded of a quote from a movie, it was called 10 things I hate about you, and in it the dad says to the daughter you had me on the bench for years, your sister still lets me play a few innings. And that’s how I feel with my boys. Spencer, he is busy trying to do his own thing. Not exactly having the best of luck with a lot of it, but he definitely goes his own way and really doesn’t want a whole lot to do with the family. Sterling on the other hand, he still wants to do things with me. He wants to do things with his dad. And that makes the times when I can see how old he is getting so much harder.  Sometimes when I look at him, I still see the little boy that would climb up on my lap and beg to be read a story. He’s awful big for that now

So, I guess my lesson for this week is that sometimes you have to let them go, you have to let them learn the hard lessons. We don’t want to, and sometimes it’s harder on us than it is on them. We have to let them fail, we have to let them fly, and we have to let them take all the tumbles that happen as their learning to spread their wings.  All we can do as parents is hang onto the moments when they still let us play a few innings. I hope everyone has a great day, and I hope you make memories while you can. I’ll talk to you soon.

By the way, here are a couple of shots that you may or may not have seen.

Kemper Lake 4-5-17 (18)

Red Bluff 3-26-17 (25)

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